How this trans person used Instagram to build a life after leaving a male-dominated working world

Sitting on a colored mat beside a DIY box full of tailoring items, including scissors, thread rolls, and stickers, Deepak’s eyes are glued on a thrifted jacket that she had recently brought. While closely looking at the jacket, she puts a sticker on the stained part. 

“This is how I repair these thrifted clothes and make them ready for sale,” says Dee while writing a number on the pasted sticker. Deepak Tandon, 28, of New Delhi identifies herself as a transgender nonbinary person. Sporting a black t-shirt and pajamas, she frequently pushes back her long hair, which falls over her face and eyes while working on her thrifted clothes. “I was like a caged bird who got freedom because of Instagram,” she says while pondering over her journey from being a scared lad to an independent trans person.

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After working in large finance firms and dropping out from a reputed course (which she doesn’t want to name), Dee’s trans identity forced her to take a different path in life, about which Dee says, “I was also not sure of what will be in store.”

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“Let’s call this a day!” A tired Dee mumbles while exhaling a deep breath. After standing up to reshuffle the hanging stock, she joked about her bully classmates. “They used to grab my d**k and would touch my a** while questioning what will you do with this?” She says in a sarcastic tone, laughingly. “I now own a business where I make money in six figures,” she adds as if answering their questions.

The journey of “Dee & Ron” (@thelittlethrift), an online thrift store started by Dee and her friend, dates back to the time when she left her corporate world two years ago. 

“I always had this thing in mind that I don’t want to work at a male-dominated place,” she says in a content mood. 

“After I left the job, my friend suggested that I take a break. I told her that I wanted to go thrifting. We bought some clothes from a local market for $35 (2900 INR). We had no idea that this amount would be the only amount to be paid from our pocket to run this business,” she narrates with pride. With long curly hair, which needs her frequent attention, after finishing the reshuffling job, she went back into the memory lane. “As a trans, I’ve faced a lot of humiliation and bullying.” An emotional Dee starts her story like this.

“Dee presents herself as a strong and independent woman who doesn’t need any support and can live and do business on her own,” says Fardeen, one of Dee’s closest friends, seated in Dee’s warehouse. “But it takes a lot of willpower and commitment to live in a society where your day starts with slurs and ends at harassment.”

Agreeing with her friend, Dee says, “The first thing that I want to do in my life is hire a bodyguard, who can save me from the harassment and humiliation that I face.”

Coming back to her journey, Dee narrates what she’s been through all these years. “From my classmates to office colleagues, wherever I went, I was always bullied and teased by straight men.”

“Men feel entitled to harass you. They think they can touch you anywhere,” she says with a sarcastic smile on her face. “If you ask me about my mental health, it’s not there; it’s vanished.” Adding to this, Fardeen says that Dee had to go through a lot of depression and anxiety before finding refuge in her business.

Back in her warehouse, Dee shuts the door and leaves for an evening stroll. “I’m the boss here. I don’t need to go to anyone for anything. Instagram has changed my life. It has given me freedom and independence,” she says with admiration for this social platform. 

“I’ve found my new voice, and I don’t need validation from anyone,” she added, her voice full of hope and energy.

For her, Instagram has given her the freedom that “very few people in our community get.” “There are people among us who have to do odd jobs just to sustain,” expresses Dee about the problems faced by the queer community.

Apart from a good standard of living and a stable source of income, Dee feels that she has found her identity because of Instagram. “Whenever I go to a party, people come and interact with me saying, Hey! I know you, I’ve bought clothes from your store,” she laughingly says.

Speaking about a Tinder event where queer entrepreneurs were given a chance to install stalls and do business, Dee says that she met a lot of people who she doesn’t remember or know but they knew her. 

“These are the moments where you can say that you have achieved something,” she further adds. Talking about the trolls and negative interactions on Instagram, Dee says that she has found a support system that defends and protects her. “If some user comments something wrong, my followers make sure to show them their place and correct them. This is the support that I expect in real life also.”

According to her, Indian society has yet to accept the identity of the queer community. The challenges faced by this particular community range from joblessness to homelessness. “When I walk on the road, there will be people who call me chakka.” That’s a derogatory term used in India for nonbinary people.

While walking on the road, a middle-aged bike rider passes a comment, “Chalay gi kya?” (“Do you wanna come with me?”) To this, she just smiled and went on. “Yeh toh hamaray roz ka hai,” (“This is our routine now”) she says to herself in disappointment.

“I feel it’s very important to understand that living in India with a nonbinary identity comes with a lot of difficulties that f**k up your mental, physical, and emotional health. No matter how strong I show myself. But the current state of my community does affect me inside and I feel depressed about it,” she says, entering her house.

However, opposite to what goes inside her mind and what she faces daily, Dee is a fashion freak who loves to dress like a princess.

Dee lives with her sisters, who have accepted her the way she is. Inside her flat, her bedroom is filled with clothes, a table with a printer, a jewelry box, and papers atop. In the corner stands a shoe organizer filled with sneakers and long boots, a large mirror, and wardrooms full of clothes.

“This is my world and I’m the princess here!” says Dee with a look of enthusiasm and self-confidence.

A black dog comes out of the kitchen and sniffs Dee, trying to get some back-scratching. Dee scratches him, jumps onto her bed, takes out her smartphone, and scrolls her brand page on Instagram, finding some new orders. 

“You listen to negativity and then this small device gives you the energy to overcome everything and live peacefully,” she says as the comment from the bike rider still lingers in her head.

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