Italian Luca Trapanese, a gay Catholic single father, is also a hero – at least to his daughter, Alba.
Trapanese adopted Alba, who has Down syndrome, after her mother abandoned her and 20 other families rejected her.
“When I was 14, my best friend Diego discovered he had terminal cancer. When I found out about it, I decided to never leave his side. I went to the hospital with him, I helped him with his homework, and I would just always be there for him when he needed me,” Trapanese told the BBC after adopting the child.
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“His parents had to work, so most of the time, it was just the two of us. I stayed with him all throughout this terribly sad, painful, experience right up to the very end. Even though we were just kids at the time, we were both very aware of the tragic situation. Diego was my best friend, and I would do anything to help him. Diego’s death left me with a profound awareness of what living with an illness meant. That’s why I started volunteering with a church in Naples to help critically ill people and kids with disabilities.”
Trapanese and his partner spoke often about adopting a child with disabilities, but after they broke up, he faced even more difficulties with the Italian legal system. At the time, single parents weren’t allowed to adopt.
As soon as the law changed in 2017, Trapanese knew he had his chance. He was told he would only be given a child with an illness or severe disability, but that didn’t deter him in the least.
“In July 2017, I got a phone call from the Tribunal. They said they had a baby girl for me. Her name was Alba and she was 30 days old. She had Down syndrome and she had been abandoned by her biological mother. She had also been rejected by more than 20 families. I struggled to contain my joy. I immediately said yes. I rushed to the hospital to pick her up. She was in a teeny tiny cradle all by herself. When I first held her in my arms, I was overcome with joy. I felt she was my daughter straight away. It was the first time I held a newborn baby. Before that moment, I have always been scared, but when I first held Alba, I knew I was ready to be her dad,” he said.
Six years later, father and daughter are thriving and happy. Trapanese documents their life on social media. Over a million followers celebrate Alba’s every milestone along with him, and he has become a popular public speaker and activist for queer families.
“Alba has a very strong personality and she can be really stubborn sometimes. She would like to play and eat and dance all day long,” he proudly said. “She loves being with other people, so I take her for walks in the park, to the museum, and sometimes I even take her to work with me. She loves that.”
“Alba completely revolutionized my life. Now everything revolves around her. She brought me happiness and a sense of fulfillment. I am proud to be her dad. Alba was never my second choice because she has a condition, I wanted her to be my daughter. Being a single dad is hard, but I have friends whose partners work all day and they’re struggling as well. I think that being a parent is hard, full stop. I can see a future for myself now. I’ll spend the rest of my life with the child I love and we’ll do so many amazing things together.”